Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Moving Away from Home - Starting a New Life in a New State

Have you ever thought about moving away, and starting a new life in another state? Here are my thoughts on the benefits of doing so, and if you are hesitant about it- why you should absolutely go for it! Coming from Detroit, a city where "keeping up with the Jones" is a heavy influence on everyone, I wanted to be able to discover life outside of what I was accustomed to and doing what other people thought was right, and the only way to do so was to get away!

If you still live in the town you were born, I am sure your lifestyle may be heavily influenced by others. It is hard to admit, and we all are quick to proclaim, "I am my own person," But face it, there are pressures from society to live your life a certain way. Your authentic self is progressively being smothered by outside influences. These pressures influence everything from the way you look and dress, career paths, values & beliefs, to who you are supposed to love and where you see your life in 50 years. Moving to another city can help you escape these pressures (society, parents, friends, social media,) so you can fully explore what life has to offer.

When I moved from Detroit to San Antonio, I had NO IDEA what I wanted to be when I grow up, and I don't just mean career wise. I didn't know who, or what type of person I wanted to marry, my personal style, what type of friends to truly value, the strength of my faith, what my passion was, my values, pretty much who I was as an individual. I have discovered all of these things in the 4 years I have been away from home, and It has opened my eyes to realize what life is all about.


Are you only friends with people you grew up with? If so, you are inadvertently limiting yourself from meeting new friends who will add life long value to your being. Yes- some of my best friends are those I've known since grade school, But new friends allow you to discover even more interests and activities that your current friends may not be involved in. When you add in the fact that these new friends will be from different backgrounds and demographics, this will allow more authentic, lasting friendships to grow. These friendships are built based on your character, not what they know about your past which means they will be less likely to judge you unlike some friends unknowingly do.  

Dating/ Love (This applies only to those single folk.):

When you explore the dating scene in a different state, you are bound to step out of your comfort zone. We are all close minded when it comes to personal preferences in dating. For me, I never imagined myself dating outside of my race. Not that I was opposed to it, it's just that I didn't see myself dating someone that wasn't my "type." When I moved, it happened. I believe everyone should experience this in life, and you will definitely expand the narrow mind that thinks you are only supposed to date someone exactly like you. It allows a person to become more diverse, learn new ways of thinking, incorporate different aspects of culture, race and religion practices into your life, and so many more positive characteristics. Besides going outside of our "type," being away from the people you would traditionally date in your hometown will help with the realization of who is really meant for you. 

Following your Passion:

 There are particular places around the world where people with certain passions and life desires navigate towards. If you have a particular passion, it is very likely that there is a place more tailored to helping you pursue that passion. Never let go of your dreams because they seem unattainable in your current location. For example, New York is the best spot for Marketing careers according to this Forbes Article, according to this article, the West Coast is the best for Nursing Jobs, We all know NY and LA are the fashion and entertainment "capitals," and Chicago is becoming the "New New York," combining fashion, entertainment, and business. Whatever your are passionate about doing, put yourself in that market!  


 I love my hometown, and it has made me the person I am today. Michigan is a VERY diverse place to live and has grounded me in many ways, but it is also home to the city known as a popular symbol of urban decay. I was lucky to actually grow up in the suburbs, and attend a renowned school district, but Detroit is the Heart of Michigan, and I represent it to the fullest, before admitting to actually be raised in the suburbs. But everyone who lives there, and even those that hear stories but have never even visited, knows there are many more opportunities afforded to individuals NOT living in places with bad reputations. I can't speak for other cities, but I know these types of places exist in every state in the USA, (except Texas, LOL!) With that being said, go where opportunity is more available- The economy, job market, home market, safety, education, all play a part in the opportunities available to better your life.


 How to know its time to go

  • You have never experienced other cultures outside of your hometown- There is SO MUCH to discover outside of the current state you live in. To this day I am still discovering new things to do in my new city, and new things about myself. I never knew that I like country music, I can eat Mexican food everyday, and I like non-denominational worship better than religous churches- just to name a few. Also the people- People here are a lot nicer, not always in a rush, and everyone loves to hug!

  • Nothing is holding you there! You are not getting any younger and the older you get the more responsibility you have. Right now if you are single, an empty-nester, work at a job you dislike, unsure where you see yourself in the next 10 years, get jealous when you see family or friends enjoying life in another state, you complain about your current residence and or you are just unhappy, NEWSFLASH: it’s time to move! Even if you have a family, if you feel any of the later, if you have the means to do so, go bye-bye!

  • Nothing excites you anymore- Sick of seeing the same ol' people, at the same ol' places, engaging in the same ol' activities to the point to were your idea of a good weekend is staying home and catching up on all the Netflix Series? Then yea, it is definitely time for a change of scenery! You are only going to continue to be bored with life and become the "Debbie Downer" of the group. 
Finding the real you is an enlightening experience. You become more self-sufficient and discover things about yourself that you would have never imagined, when you move to a new state. It's a hard feeling to put into words, but when you are not happy with where you are, it's hard to ignore. This feeling of completeness comes only when you step outside of your comfort zone and get away from the "same ol', same ol'"

 "I need a vacation-" I hear that all the time- Mostly from people who are unhappy with their surroundings. Don't just make it a "vacation," Make it a life change! My idea of a vacation now that I've moved, is being off of work, and spending time with my family- Not just to escape the weather! 



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